Tiffany Von Arnim

"Come for the bed bugs, stay for the broken plumbing!"

"there is only one floor in the parking garage, so unless you get there before 8 or have an official carpool, you are better parking at the garage next door"

"if you get there before 9am you can always get your own special parking spot on the 2nd underground floor"

"you have about 30 seconds before the coffee actually starts to pour after you punch it into the machine, so that is the perfect amount of time to drop some non-dairy creamer into your cup..."